My Chemical Romance Announces Break Up, Apologizes for Not Telling Anyone 10 Years Ago When It Happened

Above: My Chemical Romance Front-man Gerard Way rocks the house of his accountant at a post-retirement show for friends.

NEWARK, N.J. — At a press conference over the weekend, emo band My Chemical Romance announced the group’s break up and apologized for not telling anyone nearly a decade ago when the break up occurred.

According to the band’s front-man, Gerard Way, “Yeah, that was definitely our fault. We forgot to have our publicist send out the press release back when it happened and then, all of a sudden, it’s 10 years later and it dawned on us like ‘shit… does anyone know?'”

Guitarist Ray Toro added, “We might’ve forgotten to announce the break up altogether if it hadn’t been for this kid in Sherman Oaks who called my cell and asked if we could play his 16th birthday party.”

Explained Torro, “I had to tell him ‘dude, we haven’t written a song since gas was under two bucks.’ But then he said he doesn’t drive yet, so I had to explain that we haven’t been on the radio since the Michael Jackson trial – the one where Michael was the defendant and not the victim. I think at that point it finally sunk in for the poor kid.”

Asked about any future plans, the band said they’ll probably just continue – as they have for the past 10 years – to not be relevant.

Added Way, “Well, that is, aside from occasionally being mistaken by the general public for Fall Out Boy.”

At press time, My Chemical Romance was planning to “smooth over the whole miscommunication” by hosting a small, BYOB get-together at Toro’s home for all of My Chemical Romance’s fans, as well as “anyone else who’s interested.”